Charlie Productions : Ask Adam
Got a film question niggling inside your brain? Stuck in a pub quiz? Got
something caught on the tip of your tongue? Just plain stupid? ASK ADAM!
Adam is our resident film freak. If he can't answer you... well , he'll
say "Sorry I don't know", and you'll have to look elsewhere BUT THIS
IS NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN - because Adam knows it all.
Just look at his fantastically insightful comments on Superman II,
Jaws I&II and Sleepless in Seattle...
Recent sucesses...
Ben Blaine of England asks "Hallo mate, when
you off work?"
Adam writes...
Before I start, all the swearing had to be modified as I'm sending this
from work and there is some c##ting thing stopping me from sending rude words.
Sorry I mised you earlier. Have a good weekend? I will be off wed/thur/fri
and maybe even saturday! How cool is that! You should come round for an evening
of beer and film although as I've managed to string a few days together no doubt
you will be abroad or something. Let me know. I think I'm going out thursday
night so wednesday or friday would be good.
I got "21 Grams". I think I really liked it although I'm not
too sure so I think I should watch it again. Its edited like a crazy mother,
as if he had all the scenes on his computer and rather than editing it he just
put it on random. It seems clever but I don't think it is. Still, the acting
is well good.
I saw "The Passion Of The Christ" too. Its, well...I wasn't sure at
first but...yeah, no its sh1t. Some of it looks really nice, or nicely nasty,
but its pointless. He gets captured, they try him, they beat him, they beat
him, they beat him, they beat him, they beat him, they beat
him, they crucify him but Ta Daa!! He comes back to life, it ends. Now I know
thats pretty much how it goes in the book he's adapted but it doesn't make for
an interesting or entertaining film. Theres f##k all tension or emotional engagement,
we all know he's the Son of God and its all going to be OK and stuff, hell even
Jesus knew, he wasn't bothered. He kept telling everyone to quit blubbing, "I
got this man", that kind of thing. So yeah its
quite relentlessly bloody but that gets boring quickly. I still get all watery
when Sean Penn gets executed in "Dead Man Walking" and his character
was a murdering, rascist, red-knecked rapist. To be honest, Jesus makes for
a rubbish character. He just stands around looking noble and spouting some fortune
cookie sentiment. Whats the point of this film? Its not even amusingly anti-semetic
enough. At least Scorsese had Jesus fantasising about goosing Mary Magdalene.
On the other hand the remake of "Dawn Of The Dead" is f##king
fantastic! Its got a great pre-credit sequence, Jonny Cash plays over the credits,
they don't even attempt any exposition as to why or how people started turning
into zombies they just get on with it and it is so much fun. You should go see
it. Or wait till I get the DVD and then watch it.
See ya soon.
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***
F.Broadbent asks "DEAR ADAM, I
AM CURIOUS TO FIND OUT IF ROD TAILOR IS STILL ALIVE AT THE MOMENT I AM WATCHING
A FILM HE IS IN CALLED THE V.I.Ps CHEERIO FOR NOW."
Adam writes...
Rod Taylor is alive! He was also in a quite camply brilliant film with cool
opening credits (it was made in the 60s) called "The Liquidator" which
Ben, Zee and I watched once whilst drunk but then we had to stop watching because
"The Dukes of Hazard" was on. That show rocks! Rod Taylor is 74 so
how long he has left is questionable.
***
Patsy Leist asks "Okay, I'm cruising the net
looking for an answer to this question: What is the title of the film inside
the film? In other words, what is the name of the black and white chic flick
shown inside SIS. thanks, Patsy"
Adam writes...
Dear Patsy, The black & white film featured in SIS is "An Affair
to Remember" (1957). Glad to help.
***
An Email Correspondant Whose Name I Didn't Catch asks
"I come across you'r hompage and seeming's how you'r a big movie buff you
might be able to help me out. I'm looking for a movie Emelio Estaves and Martin
Sheen played together in. Emelio Estaves playes a vieat nom vet that that get's
messed up in the war, physacly and mentally. He comes home and his father Martin
Sheen helps pic up the pieces and helps him try to get over it, and move on.
Yes i know Sheen is his Real father in life. I think the movie was called "Comming
Home" any idea?...and where could I find it"
Adam writes...
The film that you are thinking of in which Emilio Estevez returns home from
the war is called "The War at Home". The war in question was indeed
Vietnam; the one that George of the Jungle started with Alfie, not many people
know that. The Producers originally intended it to star Charlie Sheen alongside
father Martin as some kind of illegitimate, left-field sequel to "Platoon".
However Oliver Stone rejected the offer to direct outright stating "No.
Fuck off".
Undeterred by this as sequels not directed by the original director often surpass
the original (see; "The Crow: City of Angels" or "The Lord of
The Rings: The Two Towers") they turned their attentions to that old cad
Charlie. Months of tense negotiations, legal battles and name-calling later
it was apparent that Mr Sheen Jnr. would be unable to break his contract doing
voice work on another sequel "All Dogs Go To Heaven 2". With only
Martin Sheen on board for the ride it looked as if the project would never see
the light of day. In steps Emilio. Out steps everyone attached to the film apart
from his dad. Unperturbed by this apparent cold shoulder, Emilio went on to
Direct, Star and Produce the film, a movie inspired by his long time hero Woody
Allen.
I haven't seen the film because I think it will be rubbish, despite the overwhelming
input of my man Emilio. For my money if he aint teaching under-privileged kids
from the hood to learn valuable life lessons via the medium of comedy ice-hockey
then it aint worth watching. You can buy in online at www.play.com on Region
1 only for £6.99. Nuff said.
***
"Keith" of Barnet, North London asks "Who
plays superman in the film "superman II" thankyou for your help?"
Adam writes...
A tough one but I enjoy the challenge. So, "who played Superman in
'Superman 2'"? Well Keith, the answer to your question is not the one most
people will tell you. Contrary to public opinion it was not Forest Whitiker
who donned the famous tights, in what has to be the most underrated sequal of
all time, but, in fact, Judd Nelson. I know this because I have seen it, unlike
many of these so-called 'film buffs' who merely regurgitate passages from "Barry
Normans Family Film Review 1995" and pretend to have seen films such as
"Superman 2" for effect. I hope this will put your mind at rest and
feel free to write with anymore tuffies.
***
"Keith" of Barnet, North London asks "Well,
thankyou for your efficient and correct reply. of course i knew the answer already,
i was merely testing your claim that you was a bona fide film fanatic buff.
and you is. o.k, now you have passed this test, you can answer my real question.
a question many film buffs before you have pondered on 'till there deaths. some
would say the question itself was responsible for their deaths. so, let us see
how you fair my child. who played chief brody in the film Jaws, and then who
took over the role in the highly successful sequel Jaws2? now, ad, take your
time, do not rush this. i expect the answer on monday."
Adam writes...
I'm sorry my reply is late, I was still in Sheffield dotting the I's and
crossing the W's on my latest project - a biopic of Sheffield. As for the question
- you BASTARD! I only got a 3rd at universtity! As ever though, I am man enough
for the challenge so, here I go. In Jaws Chief Brody was played by Quincy Jones
(in a performance I think was deserved of an Oscar). Now, bare with me...in
the sequel Quincy passed the mantle onto non other than Rod Stieger. This is
correct because if it wasn't it would be wrong, and more importantly, I would
be wrong. If you can think of a question better than that I'll send you a signed
photo of myself in a posing pouch!!
***
"Keith" of Barnet, North London asks "Dear
Adam, A question for you. How many extras were used in the filming of the epic
tragedy "sleepless in seattle" ? You was so good last time, I immediately
thought of you when this question came up in my school exam. I hope to hear
from you soon. Love from Keith."
Some three months later "Keith" of Barnet, North
London writes "Now see here buddy. What kind of a show
do you think you're running? Sort it out."
Adam eventually replies...
Dearest Keith, I apologies for the length of time it has taken me to reply
to your most recent of questions. The reason for my tardiness is that I have
been on a retreat. I have spent the last few months in Norway studying the films
of Emilio Estaves with some like-minded individuals. As they don't have computers
yet in norway I have been thus unable to check my electronic mail account. Again,
I am sorry.
As it has been so long since we last conversed, indulge me a little in the discussion
of the answer to your question posed thus; "how many extras appeared on
the film 'Sleepless In Seattle'?
'Sleepless In Seatle' or 'SIS' as I prefer to call it, found Tom Hanks at a
stage in his career when fame had yet to restrict him in the choice of roles
he could under take. As it is well documented, the studio (in this case Columbia)
had insisted on the central relationship to be between two homosexual retards
- a staple (if not a cliche) of studio filmmaking. Hanks was adament that they
should go for the more riske depiction of a male/female coupling to the point
that he threatened to leave the whole project all together and everything. The
studio, using the forsight that they are known for, conceeded to Hank's diva
like demands and went ahead with the censor troubling version they had so wanted
to avoid. The film came out and some people saw it and some didn't, others said
they had but they lied. For all of Hank's painstaking efforts at making a film
from left field, the ultimate irony is that he would go on to attain two back
to back Oscars for portrails of? Thats right, a gay queer and a peanut!
With that in mind, lets tackle the question at hand. Going back to the pre-produxion
stage of 'SIS', Hanks was trying to tailor the film to be that which would break
him as a serios actor and get him his much sought after Oscar (his loss to that
other person when he was nominated for his role in 'BIG' (I joke not) had been
a spiritual wound that was yet to heal). Hank's logic was this; Obi Wan Kenobi
had won an Oscar and he was in a film where he played multiple roles (about
eleven or less or more). It was his aim to out do this by playing all the cast,
including the extras using a blue screen, and so win an Oscar. The studio told
him he was beeing greedy and that greedy people dont win Oscars. Tom believed
them and so 117 crap actors were employed as non-talking extras to keep the
unions happy. Tom would later have his dream come true by starring in a film
which only he was allowed to be in about a man. He didn't win the Oscar despite
his nomination because they gave it to Russell Crow because he wasn't allowed
it the year before.
I hope I have been some help. Until next time. Adam - your friend
***
Charlie Productions believe passionately in doing things and always trying to stop in
time for tea.
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Park, Herts AL9 7SX
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